The Soundtrack Of Life
by crazyhpcfan
Summary: A series of one-shots focusing on the Clois relationship, with each chapter inspired by a song. Also posted on the KSiteTV forums as clois4ever30.
1. Hymn For The Missing

Thanks to Jen for beta'ing

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. If I did, Clark would have fallen in love with Lois in _Crusade._  
Song lyrics at the end.

Set in the three weeks gap between _Doomsday_ and_Saviour._

**Hymn For The Missing**

It had been so long. So long since he had last seen her. So long since he had heard her voice. Too long since he had felt her in his arms; too long since he had smelled that sweet floral scent of her hair and perfume. And it had been too long since he had felt her love.

He stopped being Clark Kent a long time ago. What was the use of being Clark Kent? Clark Kent was a coward, more content to stay in Smallville, rather than do what needs to be done.

Clark Kent most of all, was always hurting people with his actions. Each and every one of the people close to him had paid for their association with him. The victims were many, but there was one who paid a price that caused him the most anguish.

Lois.

Kal-El steeled himself from the pain. There was no benefit to be gained from indulging in such human emotions. The one person who could have helped him, who could have saved him was gone now.

And it was his fault.

_No,_ he tried to tell himself. It was Clark Kent's fault. It had been Clark Kent who had been indecisive about Doomsday; he had been unable to do what needed to be done. If Clark Kent had killed Doomsday, or Davis Blooms as he had been known then, Lois would still be alive.

The screams still echoed in his head. All of the people who had been hurt or had died because of Doomsday. So many deaths. So much damage. So many scars that will never heal.

At first, he had desperately searched for her, combing through all the Jane Does, in various hospitals, who matched Lois' description.

But as the days passed, his hope that Lois was still alive began to dwindle. All that kept turning up were dead ends. After several days, he finally built up the courage to look into the people who had been killed and remained unidentified.

It pained him to search through those people, but if Lois was dead, at least he would know, and there would be some closure. But once again, there was no sign of Lois. It was as if she had disappeared off the face of this Earth.

He should have known that Lois was gone the moment he ceased to hear her heartbeat. He had no idea when he had began to unconsciously tune into that particular sound in order to calm himself, or when it had become the most significant sound in his world.

It was a fitting metaphor of his love for Lois. Unlike Lois, who had literally crashed into his life, his feelings for her had snuck up on him. Just like her heartbeat, Lois had become the most significant person in his life. He knew for sure that he loved her.

But now it was too late. She was gone forever, and he would never have her love.

Kal-El hated his- no, Clark's- stupidity at not pursuing Lois sooner. At least then, he would have some memories that he could seek comfort in. Kal-El shook himself from this train of thoughts. There was no point in analyzing Clark Kent's life; or his choices. Clark Kent had died the moment Lois' heart had stopped beating.

Just then he heard a screeching sound. A train was derailing. He sped to the scene and caught the train just before it crashed to the ground. That was when he heard it. The most beautiful sound in the world. The gentle thumping of Lois' heart. His gaze shifted and there she was. Just a few inches away, close enough to touch.

And just like that, Clark Kent was alive again.

Lyrics:  
I tried to walk together  
But the night was growing dark  
Thought you were beside me  
But I reached and you were gone  
Sometimes I hear you calling  
From some lost and distant shore  
I hear you crying softly for the way it was before

Where are you now?  
Are you lost?  
Will I find you again?  
Are you alone?  
Are you afraid?  
Are you searching for me?  
Why did you go? I had to stay  
Now I'm reaching for you  
Will you wait? will you wait?  
Will I see you again?

You took it with you when you left  
These scars are just a trace  
Now it wanders lost and wounded  
This heart that I misplaced

Where are you now?  
Are you lost?  
Will I find you again?  
Are you alone?  
Are you afraid?  
Are you searching for me?  
Why did you go? I had to stay  
Now I'm reaching for you  
Will you wait? will you wait?  
Will I see you again?


	2. Everytime We Touch

The first thing or at least one of the first things that Lois noticed about her farmboy was how much of a touchy-feely person he was. (The first thing she noticed was, ahem the size of Clark Jr.)

He was always reaching out for some form of physical contact, be it a hug or clasped hands or a brush of a finger against her check. He could never get enough of it. It was also one of the defining characteristics of their relationship. Whenever they walk together, Clark would either hold her hand or would wrap an arm around her waist. Each time he rescued her as Superman (and they were away from the sight of prying eyes), he would pull her into a hug, just be sure that she was safe, and that she was still with him. At night, no matter how they were positioned when they slept, they always ended up spooning when they woke up in the morning.

But Lois didn't mind. She felt safe and secure in Smallville's arms and not to mention loved even at the very beginning (even if she would have rather died than admit it.) She also felt like she belonged. Being wrapped up in Clark's arms was like coming home. Clark had told her, once before, that he felt the same way in her arms.

At first, that spark, the jolt of electricity she felt when she touched Clark terrified her. She didn't want to admit her attraction to him. He wasn't her type; well, at least that's what she said to convince herself. But now, that jolt of electricity showed just how much they loved each other, even after so long. The passion in their relationship hadn't cooled, and she doubted it ever would.

She missed his touch whenever he went on patrols or had to help out at major emergencies. She wore his plaid shirts (yes! She might as well admit it! She liked them! But she was never going to tell Smallville!), and cuddled up with Superbear (a gag gift from Ollie). It helped, but it was no replacement for his touch. No matter what time he came back, she insisted that Smallville wake her up for a cuddle at the very least. Her growling at being woken up at ungodly hours only lasted a short while.

.

She knew how much her farmboy needed these cuddling session. Each death, every person he couldn't save laid heavily on his heart. He needed her touch to take away the pain, to dry his tears, and to remove his doubts and insecurities. He drew strength from her touch and this gave him the strength to keep on going.

Lois was no longer paying attention to the movie that was playing. Her full focus was on her Smallville. He had fallen asleep while the movie was playing, and was now curled up on the couch, his head on her lap. Lois had covered him up with a blanket (not that he needed it, being impervious to the cold and all, but hey, it's the thought that counts, right?), and was now running her fingers through his hair. She gently placed a kiss on Clark's lips. His smile widened and he mumbled, "I love you Lois."

Lois smiled and whispered into his ear, "I love you too, Smallville."

_**"Everytime We Touch"**_

_I still hear your voice, when you sleep next to me._

_I still feel your touch in my dreams._

_Forgive me my weakness, but I don't know why_

_Without you it's hard to survive._

_'Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling._

_And everytime we kiss I swear I could fly._

_Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last._

_Need you by my side._

_'Cause everytime we touch, I feel the static._

_And everytime we kiss, I reach for the sky._

_Can't you hear my heart beat so..._

_I can't let you go._

_Want you in my life._

_Your arms are my castle, your heart is my sky._

_They wipe away tears that I cry._

_The good and the bad times, we've been through them all._

_You make me rise when I fall._

_'Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling._

_And everytime we kiss I swear I could fly._

_Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last._

_Need you by my side._

_'Cause everytime we touch, I feel the static._

_And everytime we kiss, I reach for the sky._

_Can't you hear my heart beat so..._

_I can't let you go._

_Want you in my life._

_'Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling._

_And everytime we kiss I swear I could fly._

_Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last._

_Need you by my side._


	3. A Thousand Years

A thousand Years

He could still remember the first time they met; well, the first time Kal-El met Lois. The memories were fuzzy, but he could recall that Kal-El had been taken with Lois. Kal-El also had been gentle with her, so unlike the way he treated everyone else. He, as Clark, hadn't realised it at that time, but it was the first step to his destiny.

He remembered being afraid the first time he kissed her for real. His relationship with Lana had been a disaster, and deep down inside, he knew that Lois was different. And if things didn't work out with Lois, he knew that he would be shattered. But when he walked into the _Daily Planet_ that day, he saw something that gave him the confidence to make that move. There she was, standing all alone, staring at a piece of paper. She looked upset, something which she should never be. While gazing at her, Clark's doubts finally fell away. This was _Lois_. He knew, even if he refused to admit it to himself for so long, that she was The One. He tried to get her attention, but she was going off on one of her rants. In frustration, he just grabbed her and planted a kiss on her lips. It was absolute bliss.

One step closer to destiny.

He had always been awestruck by her beauty; even if he refused to admit it when he was younger. Lois Lane had always been, and still is the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, or will ever see. It was not only her appearance, but her personality; her strength of character. It was the way she talked, the way she got annoyed at him when he moped too much (her words, not his), and how she frustrated him to no end. It was the way she would go of on one of her rants, or how she'd bite her lip. Everything combined to create the beauty that is Lois Lane.

Clark had known that the only way he could move forward in his relationship with Lois was if he told her who he was. That by keeping secrets, he was preventing their relationship from progressing. He also knew that it would be the mistake of a lifetime to let Lois slip away. He wouldn't let anything take her away. And when he had revealed his secret, it was as if a weight had lifted off his shoulders. He had been shocked, to say the least, when Lois jumped on him and asked, "What took you so long?"

It was another step closer to destiny.

The first time they made love was absolute bliss. There had been no fear of hurting Lois at all. Not only had he learned to control his strength, but he was sure that his instincts would never let him hurt her. Being with Lois was so wonderful, so amazing. He felt like he had come home again.

Another step on the road to destiny.

He really couldn't remember what he said exactly when he proposed to Lois. The nervousness hadn't stemmed from being worried that Lois will say no. His nervousness had been because he was proposing to _Lois Lane._ He had tried to make it as romantic as he could, with the rose petals and proposing at the phone booth where he called her as the blur. Lois had, of course, said yes.

One step closer to destiny.

Everything, all of his trials and tribulations, all of his happiness and pain, everything boiled down to that moment. The moment when he would take Lois Lane as his wife, an eternal bond that could never be severed.

He looked back at Lois' sleeping form. They had been together for so long, and their love had never diminished. Clark was sure that it never will. Even if a thousand years passed, he always will love Lois Lane. His best friend, the love of his life, the mother of his children, the one who gave him the strength to carry on, the one who helped him finally take flight. Always.

**"A Thousand Years"**

Heart beats fast

Colors and promises

How to be brave

How can I love when I'm afraid to fall

But watching you stand alone

All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow

One step closer

_[Chorus:]_

I have died everyday waiting for you

Darling don't be afraid I have loved you

For a thousand years

I'll love you for a thousand more

Time stands still

Beauty in all she is

I will be brave

I will not let anything take away

What's standing in front of me

Every breath

Every hour has come to this

One step closer

_[Chorus:]_

I have died everyday waiting for you

Darling don't be afraid I have loved you

For a thousand years

I'll love you for a thousand more

And all along I believed I would find you

Time has brought your heart to me

I have loved you for a thousand years

I'll love you for a thousand more

One step closer

One step closer

_[Chorus:]_

I have died everyday waiting for you

Darling don't be afraid I have loved you

For a thousand years

I'll love you for a thousand more

And all along I believed I would find you

Time has brought your heart to me

I have loved you for a thousand years

I'll love you for a thousand more


End file.
